Was That You God?

November 7, 2014

A few days ago I was walking into Target, alone for once. But wait, there’s more.

On my drive there I was stressing over so many ‘life occurrences’ that I can’t even tell you. If I did, your brains would start crying (literally) and then they would explode inside your skulls, at which point they would start leaking out of your nose and you’d be walking around trying to sniff your melted brains back up your nose and all your friends would be all “Ew! Stop!” and then they’d rename you Brainy McLeaky Face……

So, just trust me when I say that I was dealing with enough stress to sob non-stop and it would be completely warranted.

Having a second to hit Target on my own meant I had plenty of time to stress over all the stressy stresses going on right now (stress). Not the least of which is financial worries.

Anyhoo!

I was walking into Target when a young man approached me in the parking lot and began telling me how late he is going to be for work and how his wife is sick….I know most of you can see where this is going.

He told me he was going to be late, he worked at a Wawa in Bear, DE and went on for a while before I asked him what he needed. Gas, he said, money for gas.

I hesitated a minute, I mean I’m not an idiot, I know what this most likely was. Did he look like a drug addict? Not anymore than I normally do while dropping my kid off at preschool after I’ve hit the snooze button too many times. He was very convincing but that’s not hard to do (ask me how to get out of speeding tickets sometime).

I could have told him that I couldn’t help out, I could have told him I didn’t have any cash on me. I could have made up a million reasons why I couldn’t help. But in that moment of him stopping me in my tracks and rambling on for a bit I remembered that recently I had asked God to make me aware of when he’s trying to talk to me. Please, I had begged Him, I swear I’m listening just please answer some of my pleas. Sure, I wasn’t asking for exactly this scenario (finding a money tree in my backyard was my preferred answer to prayers) but this was a moment that I felt God put someone in my path and I needed to live up to my promises.

I looked in my wallet and realized I only had a few 20’s, at least one of which I was heading into Target to spend on a new fitted sheet. I have ripped (right beneath where my shoulders hit the mattress) 2 sheets in as many weeks. I have no clue why this has started happening but apparently whatever I do in my sleep is aggressive, and sharp.

So, I realize I only have 20 dollar bills in my wallet. Shit. Ok God, I’m listening. I pull out a 20 and hand it to him. He breathes a huge sigh of relief and thanks and heads off to his car. I tell him good luck and hope his day gets better.

I know what the other people are thinking as they pass me into the store, “sucker!”. And I’m thinking it too. I realize that I have no clue what that 20 will actually be spent on. But I don’t care. Because….what if?

What if he really was stuck and couldn’t get to work and literally down to his last few pennies? What if his wife really was sick and he was the only breadwinner? What if he really had no safety net or family around to help him out of an embarrassing situation? What if?

Am I stressed as hell lately? Do I worry about my financial situation on a daily basis? Do I wonder how I’m going to make ends meet? Yes. But will I still be able to go inside and buy milk and a cheap sheet after giving him one of my last 20’s? Yes. Do I hope that if one day I’m stranded somewhere I find someone that helps me out? Hell yes.

Will giving this man money, when I have no idea if he really needed it for gas or not, make or break me? No.

Did I listen when God put someone ‘in my way’ and follow what he wanted me to do? I hope so.

(P.S. I left Target with 4 items, ALL. TIME. LOW!!!!)